most complex form of human being on earth

After weeks of hearing my classmates giving speeches about the opposite sexes, I have to conclude that woman isnt the most complex form of human being on earth. Gay is the most complex form of human being on earth.

It has been known among the world that woman has the most complex personality or wants in this world. Sometime, they themselves, do not even know what they want. Some of the more common wants are romance, gentlemanly behaviour, sweet talks, someone to pamper them, great sex, time , attention, humour, and the financial status of a guy.

But They are not the most complex form of human being on earth, because not only does Gay has the characteristics or personality of a woman, most Gay also has a ego of a man. In the midst of all the wants required from a woman, they also need someone to boost their ego. and it doesnt matter if the gay is active, or passive, because somehow, in each and every gay, it is a combination of two.

If making a woman happy is tough enough and coming from freud, "Despite my 30 years of research into the feminine soul, I have not yet been able to answer…the great question that has never been answered: What does a woman want?".

How can one balance the needs of the complexity of what a woman really wants and the ego needs of a man for that one person?

Who are we to judge on others?

A month ago, there was a report about an MOE scholar who was arrested for an obscene act in the public. Last friday, the identity of the offender was released, and I realised that I actually knew that person. We were sent to the same secondary school as part of our school attachment programme, and even though it was a short 3 weeks programme, I had a good impression on him. He came across as someone who is full of empathy, someone who care for the well-being of his students. I believe that what happened is a very unfortunate incident, and he has already paid for it, as his scholarship will most likely be removed by the ministry.

What i could not understand is the amount of hate messages, the news article has attracted, coming from people who have never worked with him, or even know him. Who are we to judge on others, when we also made mistakes in our life? At least, he accepted his mistake and has the courage to face his punishment.

Scholars are human too, and they have alot of stress which others may not understand. Being identified as a scholar means that they have a huge shoes to fill in.

Words cannot express my feelings for you

I have chosen these five songs, which reflect my feelings for you ever since we met.

Come What May
Breakeven
Need You Now
Get It Right
If You Ever Come Back

Get it right

What have I done? I wish I could run
Away from this ship goin under
Just tryin to help out everyone else
Now I feel the weight of the world is on my shoulders

What can you do when your good isn't good enough
And all that you touch tumbles down?
Cause my best intentions keep makin a mess of things
I just wanna fix it somehow

But how many times will it take?
Oh how many times will it take for me
To get it right
To get it right

Can I start again, with my fate again
Cause I can't go back and endure this
I just have to stay and face my mistakes,
But if I get stronger and wiser, I'll get through this

What can you do when you're good isn't good enough?
And all that you touch tumbles down?
Coz my best intentions keep makin a mess of things,
I just wanna fix it somehow
But how many times will it take?
Oh, how many times will it take for me to
Get it right?

So I throw up my fists, throw a punch in the air,
And accept the truth that sometimes life isn't fair
I'll send down a wish and I'll send up a prayer
And finally someone will see how much I care

What can you do when you're good isn't good enough?
And all that you touch tumbles down?
My best intentions keep making a mess of things,
I just wanna fix it somehow
But how many times will it take? Oooh
How many times will it take for me
To get it right, to get it right?

Forgiveness

If I must say the way I’m doing, I will say that I forgive but I don’t forget; not because I want to remember the bad things that hapenned to me, but because my heart is not ready to forget…
I also think that forgetting is the supreme way of forgiving but it must be a natural process that comes (if it comes) without our intervention. When we forget something that has been fogiven it means that we evolved in our spiritual way to such an extend that we are very different from the one we were in the past, when we were hurt.
I think that we should give ouselves the freedom to forget or not the things that happenned to us, so that our souls be free to follow their way…

Forgiving someone who has wronged you, betrayed you, is a very hard thing to do. I struggle with this daily. But I find that the act of forgiveness is not something you do as a gift for the other person, but as a gift for yourself.
You hold on so tight to your anger, your principles, that you just clench so tightly at this thing you can’t let go.
How do you find peace if you’re constantly reminding yourself how badly the other person treated you? Yet that person has moved on, created a new life, finding happiness in his own way. Let go, let go of the anger, and you can then unclench the hand and reach for something else, something new, hopefully something better. Maybe you don’t forget, but over time the memory of the pain fades, and it doesn’t hurt so much anymore.
Then forgive and move forward.
Justice happens when that pain doesn’t affect you anymore and the powerful memory of days long gone don’t hang around too long.

From http://paulocoelhoblog.com/

hope you feel the love

"It is not how much we do, but how much love we put in the doing. It is not how much we give, but how much love we put into the giving."

I hope you feel the love when you receive my package, because i put in all my love for you. I miss you.

favourite meal of the day?

After yet another supper, i miss my suppers in Helsinki. The hot pizzas, mcdonalds, spicy instant noodles, in the cold weathers, just made my supper very special.

We can always get these food in singapore, but the atmosphere is just so different.

Favourite meal of the day? Supper and breakfast =D

Fate

Just now when i was having my shower, i wonder if things would turn out differently, if the volcano in Iceland did not erupt, if my condition did not flare up, if i did not have to change my travel plans, will i still be able to meet him???

Things happened for a reason, and i am not sure if knowing you is good or bad.

confused...

what he means to me

I just could not stop having dreams about him, and last night, i decided to visit his profile on romeo. It is just a profile, and yet i almost have a hyperventilation when i visited his profile. It has been some time since i visited his profile.

Just a visit to his profile, and i was so "excited"... I am such a weakling and a loser.

wishing for you

there will be days like this, when i just curled up in bed, wishing for you

Epic Loser

Last night, i dreamed of him twice! twice! again! fuck, and in one of the dream, i thought i was sleeping on his shoulder, only to realize that it was my pillow =( I am the EPIC loser in life =(

Life is on the downhill

I screwed up all of my mid terms, with my best grade at only a B, a far cry from my previous semester... This means that my student life is back to normal, because i always do badly for my mid term tests, with the exception of the last semester, when i did very well.

I do not know why, but i miss him so much, sooooooooo much. It has been 2 months, but yet i still cant get him out of my mind. Was thinking of sending him a birthday card, but decided against it, since nothing would have changed.

At the present moment, doubt that i am ready for anyone, as he is still on my mind. It would be unfair for me to jump into a relationship just to feel wanted and secure. I know how painful it is to be heartbroken, and i do not intend to inflict that pain on anyone, or myself.

Last night was tough, as i cried to myself, after the bad mid terms result, tiring day, and a mistake in booking ticket for my mum, and resulting in never ending nagging last night...

on most occasions, i only give and serve with the best intention, with no harmful thoughts. I am a human, and i do make mistakes.Unfortunately, most people do not appreciate the good times, and only remember the bad mistakes.

Well, the only positive aspect in my life, i have been sleeping like a pig, 10-11 hours of solid sleep everyday!

thoughts

I had a terrible friday, because i screwed up my monetary economics paper. I could not even do a 3 marks question for the whole paper, and this will be the first time i score 0 points for a 100 marks paper =(

I was sort of ticked off when i went to hand in my documents for the internship because the lady simply forgotten about me dropping by on friday...

After all these drama, i went down to the Guan Yin temple along waterloo street to pray for guidance, because i am simply fed up with the thoughts of him in my mind. Somehow, the lot was good, and with my past experiences, we will meet each other again. But what is the use when we will be 6600 miles apart? I am still angry at him and mad at him, even though i still very much love him and miss him. How can u be angry and love someone at the same time? If we ever meet up again, our first meeting will not be pretty, only angry and hurtful words exchange, at least from me...

well, looking ahead, the shock of not being able to do any monetary economics question stunned me into action. Went to club last night, and this will be the last till my exam is over. From now till 14th April, it will be YES, Yoga, Exercise, and Study!

3 times in a night

for goodness sake, i have no idea why, out of a sudden, i had 3 different dreams about stefan last night. It was bad, really bad. because, it was the first time i ever dreamed of him, and first time, i ever dreamed of someone for 3 times in a night! all 3 dreams are different, and totally unrelated to each other. bleah, i wish i could have move on but apparently, my subconscious mind is still thinking of him.

my brain is so dead right now, with monetary economics mid term tomorrow. i hope i will be able to get a decent score, but the situation is pretty dire now =( haiz...